The video is a deeply personal account by Asiah Martin, a creative artist who shares her journey of overcoming alcohol dependency while navigating the challenges of being an African American woman in the arts and substance abuse treatment systems. She describes her struggles with creative pressure, inconsistent income, and unresolved trauma, which culminated in her checking into treatment for substance abuse twice—experiencing firsthand the lack of representation for people of color in recovery spaces. Through her candid narrative, she highlights the significance of finding community and visibility in recovery, especially for minority artists.

Martin's story offers encouragement to creatives who are new to sobriety, emphasizing that recovery may require humbling steps, such as starting over or prioritizing mental health over career. She underscores the necessity of boundaries and balance, dispelling the myth that creativity must be linked to suffering, and celebrates her own achievement of earning an MFA in dance and being three years sober. Martin also stresses the importance of joy in the creative process, self-compassion, and remaining open to life's surprises even during difficult times.

Main takeaways from the video:

Please remember to turn on the CC button to view the subtitles.

Key Vocabularies and Common Phrases:

1. inherently [ɪnˈhɛrəntli] - (adverb) - In a way that is a permanent part of something; naturally and inseparably part of it. - Synonyms: (intrinsically, essentially, naturally)

Somehow we've accepted the idea that that creativity and suffering are inherently linked.

2. succumbed [səˈkʌmd] - (verb) - To give in to something overpowering or to yield to a force or temptation. - Synonyms: (yielded, submitted, surrendered)

I quickly succumbed to the pressure to be creative for clients, inconsistent income, and unhealed trauma.

3. dependency [dɪˈpɛndənsi] - (noun) - A state of relying on or being controlled by something else, often used to describe addiction. - Synonyms: (addiction, reliance, need)

I had to admit that I had a dependency on on alcohol.

4. culminating [ˈkʌlmɪneɪtɪŋ] - adjective / verb (present participle) - Reaching the highest point or a climactic stage; ending or arriving at a final result. - Synonyms: (climaxing, peaking, concluding)

In fact, the 14 minute dance that I created for my MFA culminating project was selected to represent Texas Women's University at the American College Dance Association Festival.

5. destigmatize [diːˈstɪgmətaɪz] - (verb) - To remove negative associations or shame from something, to make it more accepted in society. - Synonyms: (normalize, legitimize, accept)

I plan to be someone who continues to have conversations that help to destigmatize the topic of substance abuse treatment in the Black community.

6. rehabilitating [ˌriːhəˈbɪlɪteɪtɪŋ] - verb (present participle) - Helping someone return to health or normal life through training or therapy after illness, addiction, or imprisonment. - Synonyms: (restoring, recovering, recuperating)

I would love to have a treatment center in which we focus on rehabilitating young adult artists, not only helping them to reconnect with their well, not only helping them to heal from their substance abuse dependency, but helping them to reunite with their artistic passions and purposes.

7. avoidant [əˈvɔɪdənt] - (adjective) - Tending to avoid or escape from particular situations, especially those considered threatening or uncomfortable. - Synonyms: (evasive, reluctant, shy)

I was constantly avoidant of myself.

8. navigate [ˈnævɪɡeɪt] - (verb) - To find your way through a difficult situation; to manage or handle a complicated task. - Synonyms: (manage, steer, traverse)

There are influencers of all kinds these days. Y' all know that we need more content about treatment, what it's like to navigate treatment, pre sobriety, post sobriety so that people of color don't feel alone when they navigate this issue.

9. representation [ˌrɛprɪzɛnˈteɪʃən] - (noun) - The presence or portrayal of specific groups within a larger group, especially regarding visibility and inclusion. - Synonyms: (inclusion, embodiment, presence)

We need more representation. We need more young African American women and men who are not just willing to go through this circumstance and move on with their lives, but those who are courageous enough.

10. courageous [kəˈreɪdʒəs] - (adjective) - Having or showing bravery; able to face fear, pain, or difficulty with courage. - Synonyms: (brave, bold, valiant)

I know it's not easy, but those who are courageous enough to tell their stories to stay on the topic.

Healing Out Loud - Why Young Black Creatives Need Access to Recovery - Asiyah Martin - TEDxTWU

Elizabeth Gilbert, a New York Times best selling author, states in her 2009 TED Talk, Somehow we've accepted the idea that that creativity and suffering are inherently linked. My name is Asiah Martin, and on my 28th birthday I woke up and there were no balloons or sparklers. You see, I graduated with a degree in dance in 2018, and I went on to do video production work for artists of all kinds. I quickly succumbed to the pressure to be creative for clients, inconsistent income, and unhealed trauma. You see, on my 28th birthday, I woke up and I had to admit that I had a dependency on on alcohol. I was so mad at the world for not seeing me, but I was constantly avoidant of myself. But on my 28th birthday, I woke up and I broke my contract with suffering.

January 25, 2022, I checked myself into substance abuse treatment for the second time. You see, the first time my family came together to fund my stay. The second time I was offered a scholarship by the owner because he believed that I was truly ready this time. And as an artist who, who did not have health insurance at the time, I would not have been able to attend had he not been willing to do that for me. So I attended treatment two times. And in both of those times There were about 25 individuals each, roughly, and I only met four African American women, two who were in their 40s and two who were in their mid-20s.

The program that I was in also required that we work the 12 steps. And I valued this program because it allowed for people who had previously been through the center to come back and to act as sponsors for current patients. And while there were so many wonderful people who came through to act as sponsors, I had a wonderful sponsor. I did not meet any African American women or men sponsors during the time that I was there. I was longing for someone that looked like me to show me that healing was possible for me.

During this time, I was also in the application process to return to Texas Women's University to get my MFA in dance. I needed to submit a video of myself dancing, and the program that I was in, the center didn't have a dance studio nor the sober living facility. So I submitted a video of myself dancing on a concrete basketball court. Period. See, treatment was helping me to get sober, but I was longing to reconnect with myself as an artist. And while we did have music therapy in which they would allow us to write the name of our favorite song on a piece of paper and put it in a hat to be drawn out on Music Friday, there Were no opportunities to create, to move, to remember who I was before all of this.

I'm proud to share that in just a few days I will be graduating with my MFA in dance and I am also three years sober. But I want to take this opportunity to speak directly to young adult creatives who are newly sober. I'll start with a little story. When I came back to Texas Women's University at 28 years old, I moved into a freshman dorm room. I would like to state that again at 28 years old. When I came back to school, I moved into a freshman dorm room surrounded by 18 and 19 year olds. But I walked around with my head held high because I knew that the path that I was on was better than the one I had come from. And so I say this to say that you need to be willing to become a freshman again. Whatever that looks like for you.

See, for some of you it's going to be moving back in with a parent. For others it's going to be leaving a high paying job to protect your mental health. Whatever it is, do so confidently, knowing that it is okay to take a few steps back in order to go forward. Creatives, you need boundaries and balance. I'll say that again too. Creatives, you need boundaries and balance. See, over the past few years I did not over commit and I did not over rehearse. But that does not mean that I did not work hard. In fact, the 14 minute dance that I created for my MFA culminating project was selected to represent Texas Women's University at the American College Dance Association Festival. And that feels a little criminal because we laughed through every rehearsal. I say this to say I give you permission to create for the sake of joy and to see what rewards might come from that.

And lastly, even on your hard days, be curious about what life has to offer you. You see, on the days when I didn't want to get out of bed, I was surprised to find that there was built in joy and relief waiting for me. So the big what's next? Well, I'll tell you one thing. We need more representation. We need more young African American women and men who are not just willing to go through this circumstance and move on with their lives, but those who are courageous enough. I know it's not easy, but those who are courageous enough to tell their stories to stay on the topic. There are influencers of all kinds these days. Y' all know that we need more content about treatment, what it's like to navigate treatment, pre sobriety, post sobriety so that people of color don't feel alone when they navigate this issue. See, I plan to be someone who continues to have conversations that help to destigmatize the topic of substance abuse treatment in the Black community.

One day, I would love to have a treatment center in which we focus on rehabilitating young adult artists, not only helping them to reconnect with their well, not only helping them to heal from their substance abuse dependency, but helping them to reunite with their artistic passions and purposes. Until then, I will continue dancing down every avenue of my creative, sober life. Thank you.

INSPIRATION, EDUCATION, LEADERSHIP, SOBRIETY, AFRICAN AMERICAN EXPERIENCE, CREATIVITY, TEDX TALKS