The video tells the inspirational journey of a woman who has faced significant challenges in life. She describes her upbringing in a protective yet adaptable environment, which taught her resilience and responsibility. Despite the societal expectations and personal setbacks, including a failed marriage and a premature menopause diagnosis, she learned to take charge and find her own path. Her story highlights the power of self-empowerment and making the best out of adversities.

The speaker emphasizes the importance of self-accountability and responsibility in empowerment. She narrates how she moved beyond societal constraints and disbeliefs towards women's empowerment by focusing on internal strength. Her experience mirrors the hurdles she faced within a male-dominated industry and personal life, showcasing her journey to create space for herself and others without certain privileges like an MBA degree.

Main takeaways from the video:

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Key Vocabularies and Common Phrases:

1. resilience [rɪˈzɪliəns] - (noun) - The ability to recover quickly from difficulties; toughness. - Synonyms: (toughness, endurance, adaptability)

We were raised with resilience.

2. empowerment [ɪmˈpaʊərmənt] - (noun) - Authority or power given to someone to do something. - Synonyms: (authority, sanction, enablement)

I don't believe in women empowerment the way world looks at women empowerment.

3. paradox [ˈpærədɒks] - (noun) - A situation, person, or thing that combines contradictory features or qualities. - Synonyms: (contradiction, inconsistency, anomaly)

I was in a perfect scientific paradox where I was, my body was biologically preparing.

4. vulnerability [ˌvʌlnərəˈbɪləti] - (noun) - The quality of being exposed to the possibility of being attacked or harmed, either physically or emotionally. - Synonyms: (susceptibility, weakness, exposure)

That boy flipped his vulnerability and he transformed into something so powerful that it became its fuel

5. integrity [ɪnˈtɛɡrəti] - (noun) - The quality of being honest and having strong moral principles. - Synonyms: (honesty, morality, virtue)

I chose to defend my integrity because I had me as a role model for my son.

6. enamored [ɪˈnæmərd] - (verb) - To be filled with a feeling of love for. - Synonyms: (enchanted, captivated, infatuated)

I could just only get enamored.

7. facade [fəˈsɑːd] - (noun) - An outward appearance maintained to conceal a less pleasant reality. - Synonyms: (front, veneer, pretense)

I was my arrogant best putting a fantastic facade of a happy married life.

8. transform [trænsˈfɔːrm] - (verb) - Make a thorough or dramatic change in the form, appearance, or character. - Synonyms: (change, convert, alter)

He flipped his vulnerability and he transformed into something so powerful.

9. adopt [əˈdɒpt] - (verb) - To legally take another's child and bring it up as one's own. - Synonyms: (take in, foster, embrace)

I decided, I'm gonna adopt a child.

10. tranquilize [ˈtræŋkwɪˌlaɪz] - (verb) - To make calm or peaceful. - Synonyms: (calm, pacify, soothe)

I have to tranquillize myself.

How a skills-based education helped me in life - Jyoti Rai - TEDxJBIMS

Before coming here, I was just getting dressed up. Why not? And I looked into the mirror and I saw someone there. And the person looked backed at me. In fact, I was at the perfect moment where I wasn't. Where I was, I was meant. I was getting ready for the moment I had prepared for. Times of darkness. Uncertainties is something one can't describe until you are in it, right? Point is, in the mirror, who I saw, I saw a brat. Oh, not the brat that you think you know. Brat. Born, raised and transferred. Born in a forgive family. Hardcore tough guy. Beautiful, graceful, caring mom. Two elder brothers who ensured that I would. I can't have any boyfriends, okay? At least super protected, but raised all over the country. Adaptation was our Ghana, you know, that was the way of life. Making new friends, leaving old one behind. We were raised kind. We were raised with resilience.

We were raised to trek. I remember I used to crawl in treks with my dad, wearing my boots and the leeches and stuff. But raised to be fearless. I didn't know all of this was my behind. The scene of life, which was preparing me for something bigger. Something so bigger I couldn't have imagined. So why I'm here and what am I talking about? I think that's where the problem with the organizers was. What should they make me talk? A business Sherpa, a founder today? A brat? Not many people know women empowerment. Are you kidding me? I don't believe in women empowerment. The way world looks at women empowerment. It's not the handouts that can make you stand straight. Still having a confidence here. There are no hands out in life. The real empowerment, men or women, starts from within. Okay, so any podcast or anything that tells you else it's to be unfollowed.

Point is, being raised in an environment that was highly focused on building skills. Our school was not confined to four walls. Our school was in nature. Our school was in learning day to day survival skills. I knew about poison, antidotes of Scorpio and snakes bite. We were raised in uncertainties that tomorrow our father and brothers may not come home. So value relationships. That was my moment. Imagine I couldn't have given any empowerment. But what I'm trying to say is we were taught to take responsibility. Take responsibility of relationships and don't undermine the time you spend with your family.

It may be appearing as if I had figured it all out, right? But I had my share of adventures. I wish koi mujos were kehde ta kamar ki kesi, you know, peti ban li jay mossam badal nei walai or yebi keta kiyutan le lo age. Well, I had my share of faults and failures, but they didn't describe who I am today. I didn't get through my MBA, but I had my head high. I got into an interview where the prerequisite was MBA degree that you have to have before you come up for this sales job at a foreign bank in Pune. I showed up. I got the offer letter without an MBA degree because I had skills, I had confidence, and probably they liked my no stage fear.

That was just the beginning. I just got myself into a male dominated industry with peers marching with their degrees of Ivy leagues and prime management institute. I could just only get enamored. But I made my space. The next 25 years was not about me fitting in. It was about me creating a space for not for myself, but many others who have no godfathers in the industry. Probably not even an MBA degree. Well, so far so good. But dialogue was famous. Please fasten your seat belts.

I was 22 and I got tricked into a marriage. I was just like any other, you know, girl next door having dreams and twinkle in eyes to live a mills and billions fancy story one day, but, well, my flight came crashing. Oh, not for the reason. The first night of my marriage, my husband declared that he is sorry and he is a gay. He did this because of the pressure of the family and he could do it to me because I was naive. I was playful. I was just a girl looking directly into the eyes of sunshine. He asked for my pardon and he said, he will be a good friend, but just cover up for him. He was fragile. I was a fudgy brat. I am raised to take charge when everything is untouchable or you can't trust. Here was a partner of mine who probably transformed into a patient and I promised to forgive him and continued as a friend. I had made peace. I moved on.

What's about crying? If this is the card that life has dealt, so be it. I'll wait for my ace. There were no aces. They were asses. But I had to play my card. I surrendered to focusing my energies to build myself in a career, putting myself on feet and not giving anybody a chance to say anything about my choices. I was my arrogant best putting a fantastic facade of a happy married life. On the other hand, I was scaling highs with helping businesses to come out of sinking ships or moving into their first sale. I thought moving on meant shutting to the world and moving on is moving on, period. So I didn't know the side effects were just waiting around the corner.

26. I wasn't ready. But the news that my doctors came up with reports. No, don't worry, it's not cancer. Okay, so the built up is not for the news. But my doctors came up and confirmed that I am. I am at a stage of premature menopause. And to make it worse, ovarian failure at the age of 26. I said, oh, shit. I prepared for that one, but not for this one. The bottling up, coiling up in your pain of darkness, rejection, pity was creating havoc. Maybe because my case files started to getting discussed. I was in a perfect scientific paradox where I was, my body was biologically preparing. But the ovaries were silent.

So much so that the case was discussed among Bombay, Pune, gainax and even went to London, that they have never seen a case like this. What is this news? What is the reason that her ovaries got into? You know, it just shut down. The only option was ovarian replacement therapy, you know, which wasn't the regular case then. So I remembered what my dad used to say because I was really clueless. How do I find path in life again? Life can't be just about distraction and working and doing well in one stage of life while the other was tanking. In fact, Tank. My father used to say that if you don't get direction, Jo, follow compass. If compass is not there, follow the moonlight. If it's a dark night, follow the winds. Dad.

Life. If there are no winds, no manual. What do do? Follow the heart. Even if that's numb. Next day sunrise will happen and we'll all get the direction. Not just you. I had that wisdom of my brat up, bringing me, bringing in me. That made me focus back on forget being a mother of a child which can't be born out of me. I went ahead with Vipassana. I have to tranquillize myself. I had to work to keep distracted. And then I decided, I'm gonna adopt a child.

I requested my husband. I think that was the best gift he gave me in return. And this was to ask for my pound of flesh. I asked him, I want to adopt a kid. He helped. But on one condition. Tahri does not take the responsibility of an add on member. He couldn't even take mine. I said, no worries, you tell me where I have to sign. And he said, the condition is that your forego all your rights. Of all your assets, including mine. I said, sure. Papa says money will make again. I was in sales career, very determined. I knew that's the least of my worry.

In 2005, July, I held Aryan in my hand. I was healing. I had found a purpose. A purpose that was also my path, path of nurturing. Who said I need to deliver a child to mother it? I had a responsibility of a child with mine. And I was ready to offer him the sun and moon. Fast forward. Aryan was discovered with dyslexia extreme. His power concentration was poorest. And he wasn't just paying attention to anything. But he was good in sports. He would win chess championship. He would do things that would amaze his teachers, but accept academic grades.

In 2010, my husband, my ex husband decided to move on. So be it. Be my guest. I couldn't have done that stand, because traditionally raised, we had no divorces at that time. In our family, with medical situation, marriage falling apart, industry, that is judgmental at times. And I had no option but go with the floor. 2010, my ex decided to call it quits. All one sided. Not that I was not expecting it. I was just waiting that whenever it happens, we should still part as friends. It's not about my divorce story, guys. It's about taking ownership again. The cards were played, tables were set. It wasn't my pack of cards. It wasn't my table. There was a hand dealing, and that hand was shaky. My husband left. He left with all the financial assets, leaving me and my son with bounce checks of rents and many other things. I can't begin to talk.

I had work that was filling up my rations. I had to give up because my son was not doing well. Fine. Bhad rona dhona hua bhad rate kabito esa laga ki I may not pass through the night, but let me tell you guys, the only way through is through it. The only way out is through it. You got to live through the pain and then figure out what you have to do. Take a stock of your stuff, take stock of your mental health. So here I was, nowhere in the middle with a child who was struggling with dyslexia. And my father used to tell him, and I think that's what I did. I made Aryan move. Explore the world with me. Trek music, you name it.

This boy was trying experimenting for six years. Except studying studies were just a formality and to just get grades. But this was not the plan. A. I wanted something to boost my morality at the end of day, which was I was raising a smart kid. Come on. But he knew that if he doesn't do well in studies, he will do an MBA and he will end up working in financial market just like his mom. And he dreaded that is it. But Aryan started showing amazing turnaround in 2018. He was playing very complex music. Musical notes of Bozard, Beethoven, symphonies by muscle memory.

He would effortlessly learn French, Mandarin as well as Sanskrit. Whichever language he picked up, he mastered it in few days. He played chess, he surpassed his competitors. He played badminton, he surpassed. But when it came to grade, he was just not there until we had an honest conversation. And I told him, you are my prince charming, but don't behave like a king. You have to get on your feet, get your act together. Studies is required if you want to get into good university. Simple as that. I personally don't believe getting A's 100% is unnecessary because my survival kit didn't have a degree. But it had every hell lot of other things.

He took a year off. He came and he surprised the hell out of his teachers and everyone. Aryan was back into his grades and he was unstoppable from the 10th grade onward. That boy whose name used to start from the last in the list, both in grades, but while he was Aryan, Alphabet A, but his name would start from down below. He topped Maharashtra at a levels. Got third position. He is today learning, studying. He is in second year medicine. Learning to become a surgeon in Royal College of Surgeons in Ireland.

And that boy, that boy whose friend used to tease him as a slow mo, as a slow boomer, you know. Ari Choro is koni samaj me ayega. He was secluded. That boy flipped his vulnerability and he transformed into something so powerful that it became its fuel. That will now guide him for the rest of his life. It wasn't over that. The vulnerabilities doesn't get best of you. I'll tell you honestly, no one tells you behind every successful narrative there is a very ugly side. The ugliness is in the fragility. The ugly is that you will break down. You will cry your heart out. And all of this probably could never appear on your surface because some of it is, you know, there is no scar for it. It doesn't manifest outside.

So blows of life when you internalize and twist it back. Trust me, explosion happens. Let me ask you one thing. If you can shut your eyes just for a moment and go back to a moment where you felt like nothing is in control, you are at a spot of no return. Who would you see in this? That is your answer. That's your toolkit for survival. Whoever you see in that moment, I saw myself in that moment. Thank you.

Can I just conclude so itana sabbatane ka sher kanega faida khyade. Try and harness your vulnerabilities. Acknowledge that you are vulnerable. Even when I was having no job and mounting bills and I got an offer from a mutual fund honcho, but it was an offer of a lifetime that could have given me the strong hope of rebound. But such offer sometimes comes with strings attached. I really wanted to give in to the temptation, but I chose to defend my integrity because I had me as a role model for my son. So, guys, no amount of books can tell you or sab? Se pale. You know, early to rise, early to bed makes you healthy, wealthy and wise. Wisdom and life has its own amazing way to surprise you if you think you're prepared. Thank you so much for even listening to me. Thank you.

Inspiration, Leadership, Motivation, Resilience, Women Empowerment, Personal Growth, Tedx Talks